This is where we share the funniest of the funny stuff that is worthwhile being recorded. The fines that are levied fall largely into two categories:
1 – Financial – pay up buddy-boy!!
2 – Kandy & Brittany – drink up!!
THE FINES COMMITTEE — JURISDICTION & SENTENCING
No one is safe. Every member is subject to ridicule at all times, and the Fine Master’s word is law – subject only to override by popular vote (which, let’s be honest, usually makes things worse for the accused).
The offence list is, by design, infinite. Turn up late? Fined. Don’t turn up at all? Fined. Throw your club? Fined. Do something hilarious? Fined. Complain about ANYTHING? Fined – because apparently joy is a punishable offence in this club. Failing to reach the ladies’ tee off the drive, launching a club into the stratosphere, nearly separating a fellow member from his head with a wayward tee shot (see: Attempted Murder) – all fineable. All documented. All celebrated.
The general rule is simple: if it isn’t regulation golf, it’s probably a fine. And if you complain about your fine? That’s also a fine.
For those fortunate souls whose offences are deemed worthy of a non-monetary sentence, you will be making the personal acquaintance of Candy and Brittany on the end-of-year trip to Kooralbyn. Some of you will be introduced once. Some of you – and you know who you are – will be on first-name terms by the end of the evening. Full strength only, of course. El Presidente has standards. 😂
